So I just almost came on my own face I had to dodge it as it was flying by...that was a first
i wish there were pregnant emoticons
btw, her name was actually Alixx. in retrospect, it was pretty much a gimme
I briefly wondered why they weren't in school, but after the tinier one shouted "check out dem titties!" I had my answer
Guess I was throwing darts at a patrons head last night, lol! Black out
i went to the 24h massage place last night and brought down the price for a hand job from $50 to $12.75 and half the big mac left in my bag.
It has gotten to a point where I just want to sit on his face. Less butterflies, more orgasms.
i need to stop meeting underage girls and letting them into the bar. i mean yea its a surefire way to get laid without having to tell them I'm 26 but i feel like as a bouncer I'm focusing on all the wrong things
It was 16 hours of liver killing mistake making goodness
This is why I only drink in places with a C or D health rating
His cat just sat there and simultaneously bobbed his head up and down while I blew him
Emojis can't explain what he felt when that ass dropped
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
I have 4 more smokes and 6 more beers to go before I make a life changing decision like that.
i think i left you like a 5 minute message about the mcchicken burger i was eating. I think I called wanting sex but the mcchicken burger was a lot more seducing.
Randomize
