Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
IM SAVING ALL MY LOVE FOR YOU
I don't want it.
I told the girl in his bed not to bleed on his sheets like the last one.
Lauren she was gnawing on a dresser. Gnawing. On. A. Dresser.
Woke up with a migrane, threw up blood, then my headache went away. I'm going to convince myself that it was just a bad batch of blood so I can drink again tonight
Were taking tot shots. If toddlers could drink these are the size of shots they would take
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
did you by any chance leave me that 7 minute long voicemail of you running and constantly tripping into bushes?
threw up in the kitchen showroom. home depot employee of the month.
She described me as " a caterpillar of adorable quietness that exploded into a slutty butterfly" She definitely nailed it there
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
Ever had someone sing happy birthday to you during sex?
That's always how I imagine things at your apartment...
Good, I'm glad you don't have some weird, skewed, clothed version of reality over here.
You'll be like the drunk Paul Bunyan someday with a giant grey cat
Learn from my mistakes, you naive soul: Gay love triangles are just as dangerous as straight love triangles.
Randomize