Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
I either date the nice guys or the assholes. There isn't any in between.
You need to find a taint.
i want to give my vagina back to god and say no thank you
Wash that dress asap. You laid down on the kitchen floor and tried to sweep the floor with your body.
Honestly... isn't she a psych major? how does she go through life NOT realizing that everything she does is a cry for help?
New plan for Halloween: you dress as Waldo, I'll dress as Carmen San Diego. We can just hide in a closet drinking till someone finds us.
Dude, i don't know. I don't remember anything after we started chanting/playing "shot of gin."
I just learned how to imitate a trains smokestack. The downside is it makes you look like you ate cocaine. The upside is YOU LOOK LIKE A TRAIN
He specifically said I couldn't post the picture of him passed out naked except for a strategically placed washcloth. Where's the fun in that?
YOU'RE MARRIED. TO OTHER PEOPLE.
And noooow we're smoking a ton of REALLY strong weed and THIS IS THE SOFTEST CAT EVER
My roommates said duck dynasty was stupid ... toto i don't believe we're in kansas anymore.
I love how when they see that I'm upset their initial response is to offer me ecstasy
Do they sell "congrats in losing your virginity!" cards and do they come in gay?
The more I think about it, the more convinced I am that I'm the solution to all of T-Swift's guy problems.
Bootycalls can't go limp that's like against the law
Randomize
