is it wrong that I prefer my women with low self esteem and a smidgen of an eating disorder?
ok so the lil girl sitting behind u was picking the hairs off ur sisters back and putting them in her mouth
He brought over a 20 dollar bottle of wine. Who does that? This is college.
She threw her promise ring on the ground, that's when the freak came out.
My vagina just recognized that song.
I just don't want to have to pretend at every family function she brings him to that he didn't hit on me first
i have a feeling i am the only one who can successfully pull off the "slutty kentucky derby" look.
you started petting my head and said "there there, majestical unicorn. it won't be long before we get you back to neverland."
Just did an entire nights worth of bar crawl in an hour. Boom
It's 4/20 of course I'm going to smoke in the portapotty and be ripped outta my mind at the lung cancer walk.
I had 17 beers 2 days ago. I'm not dad material yet
We were at dinner and dad asked me to pass the salt and I suddenly remembered doing body shots when I was blacked out last weekend.
Will keep you updated on the sexual orientation of my new guy
HIS DICK ISNT BIG ENOUGH FOR HIM TO BE THAT PROUD OKAY
I fell out of my bed whilst trying not to move this morning. I AM ADULT
I had ice cream for breakfast two days in a row.
SUPER ADULTS
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