Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
I'm pretty sure the new "vibrating mascara" is just a disguised dildo for those of us who are too ashamed to purchase a real one.
Well, at least their eye lashes will look good while they masturbate shamefully.
Ramen noodles and uncensored jerry springer episodes, what a nice life i have.
I'm drinking bacardi out of her mom's eco-green starbucks mug and chasing it with her sister's "for track only" vitamin water. Hello suburbia
apparently breaking a beer bottle and then throwing up in a urinal is a terrible way to pick up girls.
I thought about donating plasma but thats not the way i want to find out that i have aids
After grabbing my boob for a couple minutes he then decides to ask me if I was awake.
She started puking and I started running and I swear to god there was a wave of vomit chasing me down the stairs.
Double vision is so hot when a big dick is in sight. Thank you Bud Light.
Lets play a game called: how out of it are you today? Let me know if you can beat driving on the wrong side of the road twice and walking up two extra flights of stairs just because you weren't paying attention to what floor you are on....
Btw kudos to your tongue last night. Sorry about that lady jizz in your beard.
It's funny that when I fall down as an adult I'm so much happier no one saw than that I'm not seriously hurt.
Your life has no conflict it's just a blur of sex and Netflix
Not at all! I'll let your potential employer know you have a huge dick
He gave me an orgasim so fantastic that I had an asthma attack.
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