drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
u know u need to get laid when watching mike wazowskis gf from monsters inc makes u horny
I swear it's like I have a jerk off quota I have to meet each week. If I miss three days I have a wet dream and it's like a wasted jizz, and it gets everywhereeeeeee.
just caught a 10 year old kid staring at my dick next to me in the urinal. i just nodded to him and said yeah, mines bigger little dude. i gotta stop drinking in public....
So at what point do I tell her that I like fucking these hot southern girls more than I like my relationship with her?
Have your arms or hands ever gone numb after drinking too much?
Wtf did you do last night?
TO ALL WHO WERE IN MY HOUSE LAST NIGHT: WHOEVER STOLE MY BONG AND PUT IT ON THE ROOF WILL BE PAYING MY HOSPITAL BILL FROM LAST NIGHT.. AND BUYING ME A NEW, SWEETER BONG.
We're stoned and watching little Einstein videos. Come. Over. Now.
Sex last night was mind blowing. your wife is one lucky lady.
I was trying to be quiet until started to feel like my cock was being dipped in a rainbow and then I stopped caring temporarily
I'm not drinking with you for AT LEAST a day
Im gonna go for the gay guy. The ginger is freaking me out.
So I just went to clothing optional bar
Like I didn't gracefully walk into these feelings. No, I fucking stumbled and fell face fucking first.
But on a side note, how the fuck do you "accidentally " get peed on
Randomize
