For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
WTF?! TAYLOR SWIFT JUST WON ARTIST OF THE YEAR OVER MICHAEL JACKSON?! WHAT IS THIS WORLD COMING TO?!
How the hell am I supposed to know what lotion to get her? They should have a dressing booth where I could go test how good it is for jerking off, then I'd know.
you were the first one he came out to and you announced it as the finale while singing karaoke at the bar
just to let you know coffee and vodka was a bad way to start the day
That big chick who gave you the handly polished off one of the walls to the ginger bread house right before she came outside. FYI
I say we start a new tradition. I came up with it all by myself. It's called work out, lay out, black out
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
Boys should be on-demand - like, once you select one, he's yours for the next 24-hours
Captain America stopped by our tailgate. He ate a taco.
Then when he got home he face timed me and showed me his balls
i'm licking honey sensually off my arm while alone in my room. what has my life come to
He got me to hold his phone, wallet, keys and pants while he hooked up with another girl.
He threatened my life and my car because I called you. Are you sure you never slept with him ?
You and I both know it takes more than prescription narcotics to keep our family down. See you around ten, brother.
Randomize
