There's a "art of the blow job" class in the city. We should go
Baby, I'm all set with that. That would be like trying to teach bruce lee how to kick someone in the head
So much for the toy store...Not a butt plug in the entire place. See you tonight.
pop tarts are not kleenex
No I remember falling down the stairs I just don't remember it hurting.
when the police officer said he was gonna take a picture of the car accident, you asked if you should pose on the hood
I should probably file for unemployment. Sometime between last night and 4 AM I facebooked my manager the lyrics to hoe by ludacris. I'm just projecting ahead here.
Missing part of a tooth cos I tried to open a beer with my teeth, just saw a dude that looked like bill Cosby though so things are looking up
I came in and she was laying on the ground just stoking it saying "the floor is where our feet step"
dude he's still passed out in my bathtub. and his dick is half way in a 40 bottle... i really hope he was just trying to piss in it
she sent me a picture of dilf asleep in bed with the caption "what happened last night?"
Not only did my parents pick me up from his hotel room in the morning, but he also came outside and had a casual little chat with my dad through the driver's side windrow.
coughing up blood. I'm leaving for the doctor now. P.S. I just won $350 on the wheel of fortune machine in the casino.
All I have are vague memories of us eating ham?
Well, why would you bring gelado into a strip club?
Someone needs to get Mark off the roof. I told you that he doesn’t shut up about ancient Egypt if you give him henny.
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