She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
What are these yellow papers in the kitchen?
These are the tickets we got last night.
Did i sign this one as Grizzly Bear?
Yes...yes you did.
I just saw a homeless man with a cat on a leash. reminded me of you.
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
Eating doritas dunked in queso con salas. Salllas. Salska. Salsa. Got it. Shhiitt. Salsa con queso. That's better. I'm hot pink socks.
You know you're a nerd when you lose track of how many times you've gotten turned on watching Glee.
still wasted. at home depot . just threw up in one of the demo showers. not okay.
The neighborhood kids rang the doorbell in the middle of my first bong rip to ask if they could use my trampoline for the thirtieth time today...I opened the door and pretended to puke up a shitload of smoke, I have never seen a more terrified group of children
and if my full six pack comes in by Halloween there is no stopping the man slut costume. I have no shame
Hide in the closet. if you hear me yell patato salad come out swinging.
I think it's starting to become crucial that I find a companion for my vagina.
Imagine Arby's curly fries spiraled around a dick
"Let's do body shots off the freshmen" is officially the worst thing I've ever said.
Just got a blow job from a woman on a ski slope. She said ski'ing frightens her and giving head calms her down. Glad I could help ma'am!
On a scale of having tea with Ghandi to the apocalypse how bad of an idea is it to drink with a 100 degree fever?
Randomize
