Just fyi NOT a good idea to drunkenly insert your NuvaRing after chopping jalepeno peppers
it looked like a condom graveyard when i woke up. they were everywhere
how are you gonna miss the world cup? other than the olympics it's our last way to assert our dominance over China after this economic bull shit
So I drew a giant robot attacking a city on the chem test. My TA colored in the fire on the burning building
the elusive kegmastree, who's mystery is only exceeded by it's power
I'm trying to think of how to explain to the dentist tomorrow that I think I pulled my jaw muscle eating pizza while drunk.
Please tell me I did not ask the bartender how big his dick was.
So, I was thinking... Since this restraining order doesn't go into affect until monday, that leaves us 5 days to wreck his world.
You're in the clear; you and Andrew did not joint fingerbang that girl on the dance floor last night.
With the drought our water bill is skyrocketing. No more shower sex, masturbating, or pretending to be under a water fall after smoking a blunt.
Today I'm playing this game called how physically long can I Lay in this one spot before moving, do you have an estimated time of departure?
so...the lady doing my pedi totally noticed the human bite marks on my calf. Who says marriage ends your sex life? Love u!
I have an interview tomorrow! The couple we regularly swing with said I could use them as references. Winning
Any man who can do squats while fucking you is a man worth keeping.
So is seeing the guy's penis that I'm talking to something you're into or nah?
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