He bought me a pink rose and a Plan B. I really like this guy.
I'm not sure if you saw my recent facebook update, but I have already put the Radio Flyer wagon to good use. I had someone pull me to the nearest bar.
I mean, I'm twenty four years old and I've never paid for my own drink. You can't say that any of your ex girlfriends boobs are THAT great.
Neighbor who got arrested at 3am just said he'd split the $ with me if I testify as the witness in his police brutality trial. He was also holding a baby and a case of beer.
there is no excuse for drinking mascato in your room alone while listening to one-hit wonders from the 90s
I just had nipple jewelry returned to me in the law library.
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
It's gay pride, I'm in my EMT uniform getting more girls than your straight ass ever will..
I love that there are toys on the counter. Coffee, tea, wine bottles, gag ball, and handcuffs.
My kitchen gets me.
I know it's just really hard to give up sex and cigs during a blizzard
My husband was abducted by a group of disco dancers in the parde and danced off down the street. If you see him, tell him to Hustle on home and clean the cat box. #MardiGras
Is it weird that I'm mad at my boss because he isn't paying me enough attention? Maybe my dad issues are worse than I thought
Of fucking course I get my period on Valentine's Day...
You've got the chocolate, drugs and my pants. You hold all the cards...
hey i'm sure you are probably asleep bc you suck and think sleep is necessary to live or something?
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