You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
I woke up at 5am and he was watching me sleep... Come get meee!!??
I am too high to leave where I am...And they are listening to Stained. This is my living hell.
how was your night?
well, i just purchased 'sorry for being a drunk whore' cupcakes. how do you think my night was?
I have seen more male genitalia at this party tonight than I ever want to see again in my entire life.
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
You said that about some fat chick sitting on the base of a lamp post and puking. Downright heroic.
It's home.......I'm going to the store in disguise to get skittles and cake frosting. Then I'll eat the frosting in a dark corner while I cry and wonder what I did to deserve this.
captain cockblock got me again last night so i put a squirrel in his room and jamed the door shut
I met a pornstar at his bachelor party and signed his shirt giving him wedding advice
so apparently last weekend we taught the mascot how to shotgun beers. am i winning college yet?
YOU HAVE TO STOP TELLING BARTENDERS WE DON'T HAVE MORAL STANDARDS
The fact our science teacher from high school was buying us drinks and hitting on me doesn't matter.
Little girl was fucking around on the train and completely ran her head into a pole. Totally burst out laughing as she cried. Her mom was not amused. I don't think I should be a Mom. EVER.
Randomize
