yeh she's definitely getting a ham and plan b omelette in the morning
what if cement was really a rainbow color they just secretly paint it grey so as not to distract drivers
are you high?
im wtih 32a right now bc 34d is on her period. now i know how girls feel when their hookups go from magnums to regulars
She's yelling about threesomes and realllly wants you to come over. Put the pieces together.
She gave me a handjob at the dinner table while her dad was carving the turkey. I made eye contact with him. Im pretty sure he knew.
I couldn't tell you were laughing too hard
Dude I thought I set my hair on fire. I wasn't laughing I was screaming.
she asked him to cuddle cuz she was cold and instead he got up, moved the space heater to her side of the bed, and went back to sleep
Thank you for making it possible for me to get laid while having peace of mind my dog is well taken care of.
It's like an R Kelly music video in here. Only a matter of time before someone pisses on someone
I couldn't tell if they ere dancing or fucking but they won the costume contest
Just had sex in an ice hut. What have you done with your holiday break?
By the way, anytime you want to go toe to toe on Doggystyle lyrics just let me know!
Who is this? Did we just become best friends?!
we superglued breast forms to his chest. those aren't coming off anytime soon.
I'm now consulting a magic eight ball on all major life decisions. On another note I think I have chlamydia.
Good morning beautiful! Wanna steal a cat this weekend?
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