if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
ha. weirdest feeling ever. just wiped my ass with my non-dominant hand. (eating cheeseburger with right one)
Your grandmother is in heaven weeping.
it must be christmas time, i've got a hankering to give a virgin a baby....
Its officially tradition: I black out every year on michael jackson's death day..
It's Christmas week. I wouldn't know what to do if i wasn't hung over.
i wanna pet his head its so fluffy. were gonna open a petting zoo
If you want to borrow my flask for all future interviews as a good luck charm because your last one went so well with it in your suit pocket, just let me know
I ate vegetarian today, so I deserve a beer.That's my justification.
It's like you're the voice of my soul.
im lying in bed trying to choke myself out because being awake hurts too much
You just gave me the title for the series of our lives. Haha. Chapter 12: the cocaine on the back of the hairbrush
Please don't explain what tea bagging is to my mother.
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
Don't do it. He's got a dick the size of a baseball bat. You don't want that commitment.
I have to. For the sake of science.
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
He's petting your head, we need to leave now.
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