i am pregamming alone in my car. scale of 1-10 how alcoholic is that
im pretty sure thats an 11
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
I wont be hard to find. Im wearing a darth vader mask and I have a megaphone.
we just saw you getting yelled at by the cops for trying to 'hijack' a street sweeper...how have you not been arrested yet?
My dad just called from upstairs on the house phone to tell me to bring him a beer. You tell me how I am.
It was worse than when we pepper-sprayed my dick. I feel mislead.
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
Being thankful with your family is one thing. Being thankful with your friends while getting drunk and smoking bowls while eating leftovers, priceless.
You want anything?
Gatorade and you naked.
...im seriously confused as to why this doesn't make sense to you. Girl hostage, rob casino. Makes perfect sense.
Oh my god there's only so much masturbating one can do before one wants to fucking cry
Looking back on this weekend, I'm most grateful I never brought up with word "toe-fucking" at the bachelorette party.
Nick's drunk off his ass and Kyle just Texted me and all he said was "butt pirates from space".
alright well Taco Bell Closes at 12 so you better pray to god she's asleep by then or I'm running in your house butt ass naked with a bag of tacos
...I watched him run on the beach yesterday and I think I started ovulating
Randomize
