super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
A homeless man in dtwn SF was blasting lil wayne and singing at the top of his lungs. I kinda wanted to give him my life savings
Fuck him. I'll set him on fire for you. Then we'll see how good of a firefighter he is.
She was blacklisted from the Uhaul center...what the fuck do you have to do to get blacklisted from a Uhaul center
If I die I have 2 requests one a viking funeral prye and 2 I want you to take over my facebook and haunt the fuck out of everyone
i don't know what happened by from the looks of her lipstick I'd say she was skull fucked by a rhino
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
I hear youre working today. To keep you entertained, ive compiled a list of condiments that my dick has NOT been slathered in since last Friday: Relish, and raspberry jam. That's right.
This lumberjack with a huge beard is doing his group presentation in a dirty t shirt that says "I'm only 2 girls short of a threesome"
We've cranked the heat for blizzard versions of all of our strip games. Come over.
Celebrating landing my dream job by watching zombie movies and drinking free booze in the bath. I'm like 90% sure I just won life.
I'M WORRY THAT MY VAGINA WILL NEVER KNOW THE TOUCH OF A MAN AND YOU ARE MAKING A MIXTAPE
If he doesn't fuck you on the 4th of July, he doesn't really love this country.
OK, but next time I'd like to be present for our make-up sex.
roommates are droppin acid, i really should stop them from staring directly at the light bulb, but their giggles are so enchanting.
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