white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
it's not gay if you rub your penis between their butt cheeks and pretend they are tits
how the fuck did you end up in georgia? you were here at my party dry humping some chick 2 hours ago
so you mean to tell me that there is no way you can get me?
started to yawn and threw up hamburger helper instead. awesome night.
Missing a small section of hand. Hope your night is going better
This girl would not stay down. It was like night of the living dead. She kept on rising up to haunt anything with a penis
He went bowling in his bathroom.. And shattered the toilet.
Found your glasses drenched in ketchup on my driveway this morning
I watched you fall asleep, sitting up, eating a cinnamon roll. You proceeded to wake up...smile at your cinnamon roll, ask it how it got into your hand and then began eating it again. You asked me if you were ridiculous last night, define ridiculous.
I got propositioned while wearing the bottom half of a horse costume. It's like god is apologizing to me in the strangest of ways.
My worst fear almost came to light...I was choking and the cats stared at me like they had no problem eating my face if I died
I am drinking green tea.... My liver is in shock
And then he dove into my vagina like scrooge mcduck into a room of gold
I woke up completely naked with the exception of my leg warmers. Last night must have been interesting.
I had to explain to an ER nurse that I burned my dick playing onion ring toss today, your social awkwardness hardly compares.
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