I tried to explain to him that we just wanted a stereotypical black friend to be in our group. He didn't take it too well... Never take me to the bar again.
high in an attic. pig roast in 10.
like stop trying to get a relationship out of this when i'm clearly in the drunken mistakes part of my life.
You act like I'm the first person to try and hook up with a blind chick.
It's almost like he dry humped the last remaining bit of good person out of me.
I woke up with no pants, someone elses shirt, but my new years crown still on. That is dedication.
I am making a budget for 2012. Should condoms be in the insurance or entertainment category?
I think I just ate eggs off of a plate covered in cocaine.
I haven't received a dick pic from him lately. He's not even my boyfriend and I'm concerned. I hope he's alright.
do me a favor, I need this weekend off so can you work your magic and blow my boss again?
HAVE BEEN SPEAKING IN RUSSIAN ACCENT FOR 5 HOURS
SHIRT GONE
Is there a reason why your pubic hair is a plastic bag on my bathroom floor? And yes I know its yours... You wrote your name on the bag
He just got out of surgery, almost died from shooting him self with an arrow.
I mean, if I asked you, would you cum on cotton candy for me?
I'd give my right arm to start my period. My right arm. Thats more significant then my left.
Randomize
