Dan just whipped out his wang to piss in a milk jug! Hello weekend.
turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
As a driver I hate pedestrians, and as a pedestrian I hate drivers, but no matter what the mode of transportation, I always hate cyclists.
We have video of him nailing the sex doll to my wall and putting all the monopoly pieces in her nose
Before attempting to fly away into the night you asked me to take care of your sister. I agreed.
Just say you're the husband at the front desk to get in. She's in room 15 at the ER.
what? who is this?
he's just a really huge penis that sells weed
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
Ok, I have three hours. I'm trying to work out two blow jobs and a taco.
I was carrying around a bottle of Jameson yelling rescue me
I woke up this morning with a half eaten bagel and an empty pack of imitation crab meat in my bed. This is going to be my response to pick up lines now.
So. Somehow managed to fuck my contacts out of my eyes. Didn't know that was even possible.
In an unrelated matter, im gonna eat you out so much later.
walk of shame across osu's campus on game day. i can see all the spots i threw up last night. its like my personal yellow brick road.
I'd rather plunge my eyes out than acknowledge being related to either of my brothers
Randomize
