is it bad that i think of my life in terms of the sims? like when i'm hitting it off with someone, i really wish a plus sign would appear above my head. and when i throw up from drinking way too much, a minus sign.
people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
Tonight must have been good, I have already had two cups of coffee but still couldn't figure out how to operate a door.
she's like bobby knight all she does is scream and point
I'm listening to bach and watching porn,is that a sign of depression?
Quite the contrary. Sophistication.
I saw he had me in his phone as "the fat twin"
You should know that Team Beyonce's Vagina dominated in pong last night
You told me you aren't worried about the police that you've been training for this an that the last three months of your life have been devoted to building up your stun gun tolerance and pepper spray recovery time.
Its a sick, sad, world when parents get more ass then you.
If you find my purse on your yacht please call me - girl you slept with after yacht party
80% sure the drag queens carried her home
His crazy is a thing to be cherished
He's a real gentleman. At least he tried to flush my closet's handle after he pissed in it.
I'm sorry for getting drunk and throwing a robo-bird at you.
He's on the porch naked. Help.
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