my sisters under your porch take her home
Going back to college after four years is reminding me why i love cheating... they dont let me cheat on tests but they sure try hard to make me cheat on my girl
NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
You said "i miss him" not "i miss his dick." You're getting emotionally attatched. Shame.
I asked you how much you drank and you replied with "I don't know what kind of toothpaste I use."
You fucked everything up-can't pass a cleared kitchen table without getting hard
He just subscribed to one of my Spotify playlists. The next step is sex.
I'M SO LONELY THAT I TEXTED THE FRESHMAN
Sex obviously provides more sustenance than oatmeal.
put something nutritious in your body. AND NOT JUST THAT JOINT.
You were passed out by the toliet and when i said i had to pee you told me to piss in the sink. Never has a girl with alcohol poisoning been so rude.
I'm like a freaking volcano of life and sexual frustrations
I forgot to tell you, that tinder guy literally lives 15 floors beneath me. I have been creepily saying things to him like "I see youve got a hammer on the patio"
I fucked his roommate. And that roommate's best friend. And my roommate. And my roommate's old roommate.
i'm bowing down, but slow your roll.
whered you go
woke up in a ditch, shat infront of a little league game, slept in her stairway...i need to come here more often
Randomize
