I think I have a pornographic memory.
Don't you mean photographic?
No.
Watching intervention at a bar. Who let this happen??
Hes screaming about Slender man. whatever hes on is probably not healthy.
There's a point around the one and a half minute mark where the keg stand goes from impressive to pathetic
The cop was more concerned with the syringes on the dash board than looking for the source of the smoke. Thank god for diabetes!
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
I've started a list of places i want to drink. To go along with the list of places i want to have sex. Lincoln's log cabin is on both.
When you wake up, just ignore the mess in the bathroom. I'll take her home when I'm off work.
It is officially Christmas time in Chicago. There's a drunk hobo on the CTA singing the first 2 lines of Frosty the Snowman over and over and over.
Fulfilled a bucket list goal last night. Borrowed a dollar from a stripper to buy smokes
God bless Atlanta.
please let it be arousing that I used numbers to figure out how well I'd give you head
One public bathroom does not equal a wedding vow
Would you consider masturbating to Hocus Pocus an adulthood high or low?
Just saw a fat guy on a flower print moped. He's my hero.
You want further proof that God hates me? Okay. We're on the way to the ER. A homeless man stabbed me at the gas station.
Randomize
