Yeah, I have to wait a few months then take a sample in, I asked the doctor if the sample could be wiped off my wife's back...i told her he said face only.
she was most def 27.5% uglier than a troll, but the sex was great
Just wanted to let you know that I always win at "whose ex is crazier" because of you.
I heard porn and smelled bacon cooking. I knew you had to be home.
He just came in my nostril. Never look down when a guy is pulling out during missionary.
Doing lines of cocaine in the bathroom and the word 'better' do not belong in the same sentence.
So I think his penis grew over the weekend. Is that possible or does absence make the dick grow longer?
you crashed our wine night double date and sat on the floor eating cheese talking about how big his dick is.
You were sitting on the filthy kitchen floor eating a packet of grated cheese, and you were crying because you couldn't find any cheese.. I'd say our party was a success.
Please come and rip my uterus out before it does it itself
For my birthday I want you to get me in bed with Donald Trump. That is all. You have 3 months
Literally just inhaled three cinnamon rolls. Sara is staring. It was inhuman
Hey can you tell Daniel there's a bottle of Captain Morgan's in the dryer ...
Sorry I think you have the wrong number
Yes it looks like I do
The convent might be a nice break from real life
Watch out for the bush at the end of your steps. it comes out of nowhere
Randomize