did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
So how was awkward coffee with forgets-your-name?
i think at one point throughout the night i began eating birthday cake with a q-tip.
I tipped the hot bartender my entire wallet. Again.
She keeps sending, "show me your elephant trunk."
i still can't believe we survived that barcrawl. the third bar had bullet holes and we still went in.
Just pulled a muscle trying to take a naked pic. I think it's time to start working out again.
After he came, I wiped my mouth on my baby blanket. I could feel nana rolling over in her grave.
I can't believe I ever hated her sister or friends. They got her some sexy sexy ass lingerie for the honeymoon. I think I love them bitches
Did I leave the house with out a shirt or socks?
Yea, you said you didn't need them cause she was going to take them off anyways and that it would "save time".
He was telling me about how he's leaving on his Mission next week... While we were having sex in the back of his car.
It was great. He never spoke.
That's not why it was great, just that's all I remember.
we tried to make a drinking game out of 4 pokemon cards you found in a drawer.
I often worry that if I get famous, people from my past will recognize me and start talking to the media
If I slept with her my dick would come out glittery
coward.
Randomize
