Her underwear doesnt even match. If youre going to be a face book whore at least have matching shit.
We tried to play doctor all sexually then he was taking down my 'symptoms' I said I needed to puke he thought it was part of the game
dude all my bootycalls are going to Eclipse tonight... Do I really want it that bad?
We raised our shot glasses and you screamed out "TO MY DAD FINALLY GOING TO REHAB!"
hey, this is the drunk ass freshman from last night. thanks alot for helping me out last night, i'd probably be on some lawn if it wasn't for you guys! and my mom says thanks for talking to her
I mean, there was frosting being put on a tunafish sandwich. Pretty sure she knew we were high.
then out of nowhere we heard a voice yell "Fuck that pussy!"
Some one left their pants in the elevator.
He threw up in the campfire, the alcohol in his puke caught on fire. Im marrying this man
I've been trying to brush my teeth for 20 mins now... Mother of hangovers.
He's German, so by default he gets to fuck me.
He didn't even realize I was drunk. He probably just thought I loved Torchwood so much that I no longer knew how to use my thumbs
You were yelling at the mannequin and saying "DON'T LOOK AT ME"
I vomited out my contact lenses last night
Its official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world
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