I just came out of my doctor's office and i look into the window and i see a guy sitting in the front seat getting head.
why are you so shocked? you live in brooklyn.
I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
I wish my mouth had a period so that could be my excuse on those days I don't feel like giving head
the biggest problem in our relationship is that im team edward and my boyfriend is team jacob
wow, so sex, not that great its like masturbating with a warm towelette, like the kind you get at a japanese restaurant
did u really fuck my little sister???
im not saying yes or no but just know that my answer rhymes with "mess"
She refered to her bed as the "cockpit"....I understand that this morning.
The staff doesn't like it when you try and take your wheelchair for a joy ride since I've been waiting for an hour and a half.
do you think a sharp knife would stab through a cheese suit?
Im calling him
was mistake calling. If you drunk dial someone you deserve to choke on a tubesock. Take the advice. Always remember
Stop leaving me alone with my ex boyfriends after keg challenges. Woke up in his bed covered in what you think would be cum. No...toothpaste. He left a note. "Be home at four. Don't be here when I get back."
Ok, I have three hours. I'm trying to work out two blow jobs and a taco.
They were supposed to legalize it when there was a chance someone might actually propose to me. I'm appealing this bullshit.
Hell no. Last time I used a Slip N Slide I ended up with bruised ribs, a broken fence and the hatred of a half naked girl with a sprained wrist.
She's still mad at me for saying she looked pregnant and not getting her chicken nuggets.
Randomize
