OKAY SO WHENEVER I SEE AN UGLY COUPLE I ALWAYS WONDER WHAT THEY SAY TO EACH OTHER IN BED. creepy?
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
do you ever lay in the bath and watch the blood hit the water?
EWW. Don't discuss your period with me. You can go shave your back now.
is it bad that i regret hanging out with a girl tonight because that means i have less time to sit on youtube watching xmen cartoons?
fter the third song from an iPod commercial played I realized how much that frat sucked.
my goal is to not remember how i make a living by 9pm saturday night
I'll be a little late, "getting ready for the party" turned into "smoking a bowl and doing lines in my room for an hour and a half." But I'm on my way now. With coke. And weed.
Christ, I really took the slutcake last night.
Wait. Someome brought slutcake?
That's all? I'm a pro at gay chicken. I'll touch his dick, I have no problem with that.
I have made the descision to sacrifice the first of my family's dogs that wakes me before noon tomorrow. I may quickly become the family outcast
jut tell him gently that you'd rather spend more time with his dick than his face
So I found out me and this guy I was drinking beer with tonight both got lactated on by the same stripper. We're milk brothers.
You should come over tomorrow. Wine, pizza and my vagina. Those are all great things.
Ah, Christ. I just saw a D lister I made out with once on a Rock Of Love rerun. Why are you asleep right now? Some weird shit is happening.
There's a dryer on fire at the laundromat, and everyone's just standing around taking pictures. Except me. I'm texting.
Randomize
