I just got hard thinking about a crunch wrap. Im done
I've spent the last three hours watching 30 rock and eating marshmallows and ham. I'm considering taking up weed to justify my lifestyle.
She dropped a weight class after every shot I took. I thought I was just drink something magical.
honestly I asked the same thing when we had our slip n slide and margarita party
it's been dubbed the summer of antibiotics
Just so you know, you're MY booty call. Feel degraded.
sold 4 oz of weed today pantsless. man i love college.
So I hear you're taking over showing your penis responsibilities now that I'm gone?
I just googled, "how to do boob makeup" thats the kind of night I wanna have.
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
I did a kegel this morning to determine if I had been penetrated during last night's blackout. Nope.
My friend asked me if I got home okay and I replied "Glad teat. Goodnight." Usually I can translate drunk me, but I'm even lost on that one.
I woke up to both of you drawing on me in sharpie, unless a glorious threesome was had the night before that is not okay.
Who says it wasn't?
You seem to be avoiding the poop question. How did you poop on your hand?
He has the fingertips of a God
Randomize
