I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
What happened last night?
You soiled yourself again and told everybody that you'd given birth.
Just went to my life planning class. The professor has a braid going halfway down his back and an earring.
(917) i just came from walking.
haha you just came from walking?
she insisted that i refer to her boobs by name.
I wasn't sure if "you're even prettier in the dark" was a compliment. Hmm.
who paints a picture of their own dick and sends it to people. i dont know if its borderline crazy or just fucking genius...
I just test ran being their maid. I'm getting 50 bucks a month and they're buying the costume.
She fucked me for a ride to the airport. If this is what the rest of college is like, I'm never graduating.
So puking trix and chicken wings is horrible but atleast we got free drinks for taking the trash out at the bar we are really movin up in the world
It's fucking New Year's. I can be soberish in 2013 after tonight. It's like the 30 years of grey area between Jesus' birth and death.
It was rough. I have dried puke in my hair and I don't know if it's mine or from the girl I met on the ground waiting for a cab.
If I'm not drunk and wearing a penguin hat by the time we are done opening Christmas presents then coming home for Christmas was a complete failure
They had an Olympic theme party at her work yesterday. She brought home her fake gold medal and hung it on my cock after she rode me.
Just wore the promise ring dad gave me freshman year of high school as a fake wedding band while I bought a pregnancy test. I think it's safe to say that's not what he had in mind with that gift 14 years ago.
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