I want 2 things right now, you or a cig
cig
I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
strippers are much less mysterious after you sleep with them
We probably shouldn't have forced that guys cat to drink the grey goose while we were doing lines in his bathroom
There's cake. And donuts. And strippers. It's like 5 year old me and 20 year old me are throwing a party together...
She swung at the pinata with crutches
I've just never had a dinner guest strut in, go directly to my bathroom, vomit.. then come out demanding whiskey and food.
first one here with a pint of chicken lo mein, aspirin, and diet green tea ginger ale, gets a full effort bj the day after tomorrow.
You okay?
I walked into work with a banana and a loaf of bread
He took getting"shit in your neighbors hot tub drunk" way to literally
Got to the gym, getting changed, found a jello shot in my shoes.
It's funny to me the only time that you clean up is when your weed delivery man is on the way.
WHAT KIND OF GUY JACKS OFF TO A PICTURE OF A BUTT WHAT IS THIS THE 1980s
Why is everyone giving me a hard time for drinking?!
Your in the library.
But really, what kind of hoe life adventure in Mexico would you do that would top me blowing a trucker?
Randomize
