And. No one ejaculated on anyones face. This is all wrong
She fell down the stairs and hit her head on the concrete. Then she stood up, flashed us and stumbled away. I forgot to get her number..
I believe some people would call last night an orgy.
Ha, I bet. You tipped the waitress like 10 bucks for a glass of water.
So was it you or me who decided it was a good idea to inscribe fuck you on the counter?
That was me. Just a 'welcome to our home' kinda thing.
DO IT, or I'll send you pictures of my hickey to remind you of your loneliness
His and hers buttplugs were a resounding success. Tru luv
I hooked up with a British man... Wiz Khalifa has your bra... Couldn't have been a more successful night!
Just saw a couple chasing each other on lawn mowers. Oh South Knoxville.
I hooked up with a guy dressed up as morning wood. Needless to say he lived up to his costume.
I have suspicion of morning wood.
How are you unsure as to the current state of your penis?
The girl in line in front of me at the grocery store is buying wine, m&m minis, a toothbrush, and condoms. Is it inappropriate to high-five her?
Your not drunk until you have to grab on to the grass to keep from falling off the earth.
She told us she had powers and that eating tree bark cures the shits.
We have ur drink. Mom passed out in the bathroom. I'm goin to the other bathroom. Bs at the top of the stairs on way outside.
Randomize
