Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
May have finally hit rock bottom...bouncer from the strip club informed me I wore the same shirt last night
you thought you were invisible so you started narrating your actions.
Accidentally spilled a drink on her roommates skirt, offered to clean it, and got a blowjob out of the deal. Something went horribly right.
She gave him a lap dance on the glass table. You can guess how that ended
Don't upload the drink o meter to your google calendar. Somehow binge drinking looks even worse with a time stamp.
Smoked a joint and chugged some pepto. Feeling a lil better... Not sure which is working..... Gonna keep doing both.....
I am too young to be this hungover
Is this your way of saying you want a sober 19th?
WHITE RUSSIAN BREAKFAST CEREAL.
Saw my drug dealer at Easter mass with his family so that was weird
They forgot my ranch. They're dead to me.
I've decided to have sex with him one more time to make sure I don't like him
He texted me "sup", so I sent him that gif of the surprised guy and apparently it offended him
she's pretty fucking smug for someone who has had unprotected sex with a convicted felon
What did you give up for lent?
Diet and excersize. And I'm never going back...
Randomize
