people and things i regret. that's what i want to do tonight.
and when i put it inside her she yelled "welcome aboard!"
He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
he wont speak to me right now because i told him it must suck knowing he'll never be as good as edward cullen..idiot.
i kept drunkenly begging people i met to be in my facebook mafia
just left the emergency room. condom extraction.
Just made a makeshift menthol by rolling a listerine strip into a regular cigarette... Poor? Who, me?
Jessi just used the excuse "it's not you it's me" to get out of getting a lap dance.
I've reached the point to where my pre-gaming needs to be limited to pre-inning-ing
She told me she loves her boyfreind while she was giving me head. He must be a nice guy
Mostly what I remember is someone saying "raise your hand if you're too turnt" then raising my hand and falling
I just had sex on a roof
Is it weird to wish your favorite hooker "happy thanksgiving"?
I need to learn how to not be a fucking liability
It was like mission impossible.
but with sex.
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