You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
I plan on putting pajamas back on after I shower. Today is going to be awesome.
Oh my god it just tripped me out that I used to be a baby, I had to tell you.
He must be back home now. He moved his box of beer from her porch to ours.
FUCK YOU CALIFORNIA. YOU DO NOTHING RIGHT. FIRST PROP 8 AND NOW THIS.
Just charged fat mistake $3 for a beer.
They woke me up at 4 in the morning screaming "drunk adventure time!" because they needed a sober chaperone. They made me walk them around the block shoeless.
He invited me over for shower sex and pizza. Officially the best booty call relationship around.
Got back to find Sarah in her underwear eating peanut butter and watching Arrested Development with the thermostat at eighty.
He fed us edamame like baby birds. Slowly all coming back to me.
You need to somehow incorporate the phrase "these hoes ain't loyal" into your best man speech.
she paid $15 and a box of cheerios for their acid
i realized my signature handshake has now become a hookup. i love what college has done to me.
Funniest thing happened to Chloe! She talked the bf into a mmf threesome, and he loudly and enthusiastically discovered he was gay during it. Whole dorm literally heard it happen.Well funny for me. Chloe not so much.
I’m on my way to fuck the new hockey player
Ride him like a Zamboni
Randomize
