'Watching yourself cry on Photobooth' is the new 'watching yourself cry in the mirror.'
his penis was like watching paranormal activity your very hyped up to see it but you think it might be very scary and in the end you didnt really see anything at all
I just saw the preacher from the church I grew up in while I was buying condoms at the drugstore... he remembered me.
whenever he goes down on me he looks at me and I just want to poke him in the eyes
Bad news. Pictures just stimulated my memory and i just realized the stripper I hooked up with this weekend tasted like pizza.
My mom is holding a picture of me, crying, and saying "where did I go wrong" over and over again.
If I should ask "why am I still single?" could someone please remind me of shooting mike and ikes out of my nose at the bartender last Saturday. many thanks
What should we drink tonight, I'm in the mood to be judged
All this studying of HIV makes me want to have sex with you.
I'm perplexed as to why anyone on this planet is straight
Think I was still drunk when I woke up cause I went and bought a mandolin
i dont believe you. i want proof. if you end up at a hospital send me a pic.
Just puked in front of a high school tour group. Based on the standing ovation, we have a solid group of freshman coming in this fall.
Who in their right mind would frost a cake with their butt?
I've been eaten out in coupes, sedans, trucks, suv's, you name it. If I can do it in a smart car, you can do it in a vw beetle.
I knew you were the expert on doing it in public. You need to get paid for your advise
Randomize
