Hey, It's Lauren. i wanted to talk to you tonight. I like you, as you know because kyle told you. I was wondering if you liked me too?
Are you in the third fucking grade? Check yes or no.
does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
Wow... that's disturbing man, and their not even my balls
I'm pretty sure whiskey overrules bulimia in the eyes of Texas boys
I think he just made me trade sex for my cat.
I peed on his girlfriend's loofah during our post-sex shower.
One good thing out of all this is her ass is huge. Like Australia Big.
Well my friend Jon slept on the couch and I slept next to my cooked lean pocket on the carpet
Do you remember biting my ear and whispering quotes of Pride and Prejudice last night?
He jumped into a mall fountain. I don't think that warrants a lifetime ban or the disorderly persons charge, but whatever. Fuck you Pennsylvania.
Did you just email Kelly and I gay dinosaur erotica?
And I woke up by myself with peanut butter.. Cool
I'm to childless and to single to be asking myself why I'm so sticky
Don't EVER mix a flaming shot, with a Jello shot.. As good as it sounds flaming Jello is not a good idea
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