I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
We could sell used underwear with pictures of us wearing them.
Im def. not watching the CMAs. If Kanyes not gonna be there whats the point?
So, remember how that one doctor said it was 1 in a million that I'd get pregnant...
Yeeah thank god
Well..welcome to parenting Mr. one in a million.
Tostitos Scoops as shot glasses. Eat for chaser.
just heard a glass bottle fall in lecture and my first thought was to yell party foul.....is it friday yet?
I'll have you know that I'm still picking duct tape residue off my wrist from sunday
Oh god, so much rum. I think I was in a shotgun wedding with a Bacardi promotion girl.
Drunk at ten am watching Californication re runs. Being divorced rules.
Just saw a woman in bootie shorts and a winter coat at the library. God. Bless. Prostitutes.
So both cops helped talk her into coming back into the bar and doing a shot with me. The main argument being, "a bar is no place to be sober!"
Tequila, beer, rum, gin, and vodka all mixed in my body last night. The whole "never turn down free booze" is catching up to me. Hungover = understatement of the year.
He asked me for a pic so I sent him a pic of my boyfriends dick.
I'm going to give you the best blowjob of your life. And yes you can use my mom's printer.
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
Randomize
