she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
is it weird that i feel like i won the break up because my status change got two comments and his got zero?
What do you mean when you say no pre-party sex?
day 8: i just gave goat a piece of pineapple soaked in rum. as an animal science major, im ashamed. as a normal person, it was awesome.
Legitimately semi-blackout across the table from the governor off a chardonnay i can't even pronounce.
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
Are you sighing at your phone and judging me right now?
Food lion is just a portal. Cheetos are the goal. Its like not banging a super hot chick cause she is french. She still has the same parts just from a different box.
Now I am going to fly my toy helicopter in the dark.
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
Why did you load my phone up with pics of Al Gore?
She told me she brought a guy home but that he looked pickled. And no, that's not an autocorrect.
Hahahah pickled
I asked her what she meant and she said that he looked like he had soaked in water.
No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.
I didnt realize until i got your email that what i've been missing in my life is someone to send me dog gifs
He was walking around and kept offering the neighbors flamingo lawn ornaments shots of vodka.
Someone made a Christmas song to the Flintstones theme and I'm suing for emotional distress.
Randomize
