Would it be cruel if i sold xanax instead of adderall to freshman unfamiliar to the drug-taking profession?
Dude. I have been looking at your movie history on netflix and it is like looking at the rings of a tree. Only instead of telling me how old you are, it tells me when you were stoned.
I should just tell him this. He doesn't need to be all nice and ask me on dates and to do gay stuff like hangout during the day. I'll still sleep with him regardless.
Of course my walk of shame coincided with the alumni marathon on campus. But, I did get a thumbs up from the woman handing out water.
So the bartender just told me that there was numerous people who saw me having sex on the rooftop last weekend. +1
remember to ask your mom about the name of her pet duck so we can name the bowl
Got my bloodwork back and my liver is in tip top shape. Apparently blacking out 5 nights a week isn't cutting it, so we've got to step it up until I see that all of my hard work is actually paying off and doing some damage.
nah i think i'm gonna take my landlord's kids trick-or-treating instead. apparently the houses around here hand out wine to the adults and candy to the kids.
Apprently after I bit that bouncer, it all went down hill.
The best, and by the best I mean the worst, was the 7 month along pregnant chick in the skin tight body suit.
Not sure if you're still doing the whole "sleeping with only one person" thing but if you're not we should sleep together when I get back in town tonight.
How's dinner? Come here? You can bring your boyfriend if you're ok leaving without him
I woke up like how did I get here this blanket is nice but it was just the curtain
Dude respond to my evite. You're either coming to the orgy or not.
What is the acceptable way to offer a trade of sex for a few hours of body heat?
Randomize
