Non-Jews are for practice
is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
They made my facebook status "I got my period!!!." Every guy I've had sex with at college liked it.
I feel like I should put "don't judge me" in the special instructions for the pizza guy.
So many tools at one table, you'd enjoy my italian family
Why do fat girls all have such cute faces?
God wants them to get laid too.
We have a tower of vodka coming. OF VODKA
There's a stripper banging on the door demanding to see you.
Just met another girl you fucked but this time in seattle. Your cock gets almost as much mileage as jet blue. Anaheim and seattle both say hi, figured you don't remember their names.
LEAVE MY LITTLE DICK OUT OF THIS
She was a little hefty, so I turned on the strobe light in our room. Everything looks better with a strobe light.
YOU ARE TAKING ADVANTAGE OF MY INEBRIATED STATE
YOU ARE DRUNK AND USED AND SPELLED THE WORD "INEBRIATED" CORRECTLY. I AM TAKING ADVANTAGE OF NOTHING.
I CAN'T HELP THAT I'M MULTITALENTED YA FUCKER
THEYRE FUCKING GOLD
Are you talking about the color of my tits or the quality of my nudes cause both are
Three Decembers later, I'm looking at this fuckin Santa lingerie I bought and just realized my stocking never got stuffed....
Should I apologize for the loud sex I had in his living room? Because I'm not going to.
Definitely not.
Randomize
