Alarm just got pulled in my exam
Swear it wasn't me
We need to get cat food
Nevermind, the cat will eat lucky charms
maybe i get so drunk and make stupid mistakes cuz Subconsiously im preparing for my real world debut
I had to go to the bank to confirm purchases made on 10/31/09 because they were signed as Lady Gaga
we all took turns holding you up and pretending that you were simba and that we were presenting you to the jungle
One step ahead. Always. Roses are red, violets are blue... I'm gonna fuck you with a rake.
K, so let's go ahead and say that mcnugget and margarita Tuesday was a bad idea
Based off the amount of cat hair on my poncho....i stole a cat last night.
Apparently, the right response to, "How do you feel about a terrorist being in the area?" isn't, "Well, we have vodka in the freezer, so we're good for now."
Yeah because the only thing stopping you from fucking Emma Watson is you not being a Gryffindor
Last night you dunked donut holes in spinach dip, ate it, threw up, and continued eating. I cant keep up with your drunk eating skills.
I was wondering where the donuts went.
You started yelling about vegans ruining the world. Because we drove past some cows eating grass.
He was referring to me as "Teenage Dream" the whole night
I think my moral compass just broke
Only I could dislocate my ribcage coaching volleyball and still want to get drunk tonight.
Randomize
