we should go somewhere reaaaaaal shady
I swear, if I find out you're lying, I'm going to put your name on one of those herpes watch websites and put the link up on every social networking site in existence.
even after i explained my bobby knight costume the bartender still kicked me out for throwing the chair
You're going to have to tell him your name isn't Ivor McTruckson eventually.
Why do i even want him? It's like his dick is a trophy and I need to put it on my wall of shame.
yeah they are definitely having sex in that car. joe just yelled through the window telling them to do the "titanic hand print thing"
We had a 30 min conversation last night about whether or not to bone that girl with a lisp to see if she moans with one...
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
Stormed out of the house in frustration and now I'm in public and have to take a rage dump. Today sucks.
Your loyalty to the Redskins reminds me how no matter how much I disappoint you, you will still always be rooting for me.
You'll be like the drunk Paul Bunyan someday with a giant grey cat
Well I may have gotten laid but I over drafted buying pizza so I think that negates everything
He told me I had smoking hot areolas then he wins an executive of the year award. How does that even happen?
HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED
Plus my parents would be pissed if I spent Thanksgiving in jail... again.
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