i'm so high i feel like the people i'm chatting with online can some how see that i'm naked.
My mom is giving me a "don't tape yourself during sex" talk. It's going to be a long car ride.
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
theyre doing DJ Khaled impressions again...
Just to be safe, you should be prepared to jump out of a second story window
i miss our vodka / percocet laundry days.
My picture of a beer can in a McDonalds cup full of ice got more likes than my relationship with her. Is beer THAT much better than monogamy?
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
Ill give you a 4 hour blow job if you make my nephew go to bed.
I am coping with the snow storm with beer and shots of jack. If I were outside in shorts I might be able to pass as a Canadian.
It's like wanting to be a vampire vs being a vampire. You don't know the cock lust until it's infected you.
My whole house smells like Spaghetti-Os and cat litter. I think I've failed as an adult.
This weekend I was almost blinded by a cumshot to the eye, so happy Labor Day I guess
Like I could never be a lawyer because I would just look like a porn star impersonation of a lawyer.
Hey, what's the French word for when you meet your boyfriend's friend and you have that gut feeling that you smoked pot naked in a hot tub with him at a house party years ago?
Randomize
