My psychiatrist is "consulting" others. I am high-achieving nuts.
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
he asked me to hangout with him...and his son
I'm a little upset you wasted 3 beers on your wet tee shirt contest.
Haha yeah my head's fine..sorry about the dent in your fridge.
His mom already thought we were lesbians BODY SHOTS WERE JUST NOT AN OPTION SORRY
Either your boy toy or the kid who pulled a knife on me in high school is here
i tied my phone to a string attached to my bra. i am NOT losing it tonight
Just so you know, I woke up with 2 oven mits in my bed and no clothes on.
You introduced her by saying, "This is the girl who sexes me." Then you passed out on the coffee table.
at one point while they were drilling into my jaw I just remember thinking "will I ever be able to suck dick again"
That's MADAM THUNDERCUNT to you
There's nothing like when u really click with a stripper
I asked him if we were exclusive and he followed up with, "If a tree falls in the woods and no ones around, does it still make a sound?" Wtf am I supposed to do with that?!
He has the fingertips of a God
Randomize
