I've done 29 out of the 30 things to do to a naked man according to Cosmo. I don't know if that makes me innovative or slutty.
Genius.
Tears do usually get me what I want. That and oral sex.
it was a sick party until you insisted on putting on "that's how I beat shaq"
Just shaved my vagina. It's been so long I forgot what it looked like. You need to come over right now.
Are you still giving blowjobs?
Who is this?
I said i love rain, just to change the subject, and he said 'id like to do it in the rain'. Dear lord. He doesnt stop
EMERGENCY: IS A KAREOKE RICKROLL ACCEPTABLE IN THE YEAR 2011?
i think i broke my dog last night...fuck
I shaved my asshole for you. You WILL fuck me tonight.
Current state of being: shivering like a new born kitten on the bathroom floor
You know what else? He didn't even get to see my butt. And my butt is really cute. Car sex is awful.
He wants to buy me a wedding ring and pretend to be married to someone else when we fuck. It actually makes me wet thinking about it.
I want sex. When is an appropriate time post funeral to ask for something like that. Like when it gets dark out?
It's a race to see if I finish the bottle first or my homework
dude I fucking saw you snort tequila
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