I wanna crawl in your skin and have dreams about Bobby Kennedy tonight.
i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
Only in Alabama do they play hymns in a bar!!!
you miss my big massive throbbing cock dont you?
Woah.
that's not how you spell hell yes.
Just printed out my Plan B coupon at the library. Saving my own printer ink and paper as well as 10 dollars towards not being knocked up.
Apparently we had sex last night, and then I made him drive me to the beach so I could puke in the ocean.
make sure nobody uses the downstairs toilet. i like to have an unused toilet for the weekends. dont shit where you puke i always say.
It's a never ending cycle of men I've fucked knowing other men I've fucked. I need a new town.
About to be a 4Loko vomit fountain in 45 seconds, what color will it be? Animated birds will fly out of me.
We kind of broke a table making out. So yes, I'd say it was successful.
Just realized I'm still chewing the same gum post blow job. This Stride shit really has everlasting flavor. They should totally have an ad campaign based on blow jobs.
They started shooting fireworks out of a dryer. It was my cue to leave.
I'm making myself the patron saint of bisexuality
The squirrels were at the front door. Dude I swear..
At least get laid and waffle fries out of it you whipped basterd
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