just by requesting 'I think we're alone now', not only did you achieve emptying the bar, but you also rubbed it in the owners face.
It's like having an annoying little brother who wants to have sex with you
I want you more than these girls want KFC
i fucked a milf yesterday.
i'm not impressed, in this generation that could technically mean a 16 year old.
We stayed in and smoked weed and watched Dreamgirls. We made each other's vaginal lips sing the songs. Mine was Beyonce, hers was Jamie Foxx. I think this is one of those times you're jealous you're not an awesome lesbian.
All I can think about is getting a lawsuit and chocolate
Doubtful. That seems irresponsible. The 4th will kill you if you stopped drinking until then. Let's think logically.
You leave me no choice. Your vagina is grounded. It can just sit there and think about what it's done.
can we get vodka so I have an excuse for being an emotional wreck
Whatever. I'm just trying to get my dick sucked while taking online harmonica lessons
...im seriously confused as to why this doesn't make sense to you. Girl hostage, rob casino. Makes perfect sense.
I got kicked out of the men's bathroom at the diner last night because i was straddling the sink attempting to pee with pants on. Beat that.
If the smell of things stopped me from putting things in my mouth. I wouldn't be popular with Grindr guys.
Oh god establish a safe word
I'm going to! Pineapple.
Etiquette question... How do you tell your mother that her nipple is out in her fb profile picture?
Randomize
