We are surrounded by old people. Heavens waiting room for sure.
whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
Jake died.
WTF????????? That's how you tell me????
Oops typo. Jake cried.
just had sex with a midget and didnt wrap it... were totally gonna have a tv show :)
im proctoring the SATs right now and im still drunk from last night. i really wanna tell these kids that this fucking test doest mean shit and they will just be constantly drunk once in college.
he described going down on me as being like 'entering a jungle of deliciousness and fur
I'm hard boiling eggs, drinking rum, and talking to my 8 year old brother about the 10's times tables. This is what thursday is all about.
I feel like college is just one giant drunken trip to Taco Bell
These eggs taste like chocolate chip cookies. This is the best hangover ever.
I feel that the drunker I get, the drunker Facebook gets.
Bitch, it's 2 in the afternoon.
i ate a whole tub of butter with my hands last night. don't tell me about rock bottom
All I know is you walked out of the kitchen in some kind of French onion dip bra and started passing out individual chips to guys saying " do you dip?"
SEX BINGO!
Canadian or clown?
I want to show up to tomorrow's study group looking like I got hit by a train. A train made of dicks.
My life is far to together for someone who's such a hot mess inside
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