After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
you dont remember trying to break dance in the middle of the casino floor on ur own throw up?
oh that explains alot.
ugh. my friday night is playin' Farmville on my face. time to harvest the blackheads...
I can't get a boner in the bathroom of a buffet.
he walked out as i was licking snow off of his car...
I called for backup and had two guys carry him to the shower. The bigger guy offered to wash his hair.
my head gets it he sucks but my LAME FUCKING HEART IN MY VAGINA doesnt
It's like a booty call, except its for tacos...and you're my brother.
Jesus, I just want to drink. Also simultaneously punch things and rub my vagina on them.
I smoked out of two pipes at the same time while my friends wielded the lighters last night. It felt like I graduated to the next level of stoner.
some kid lit a j in the bar tonight. i was in awe of both his boldness and the severe beatdown he received moments later
I literally just skipped to the fridge when I realized we had enough vodka left to get day drunk
at first i said "no rollerblading if I'm going to be drunk," but we all know how that went
Why did u text me "I want to get drunk and go to pizza hut tomorrow. don't let me forget." at 3am??
That text was pretty fucking self-explanatory, man.
Randomize
