I just found that girl ____ on facebook, her activities include "church nursery" yikes
The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
You guys better make it up to the cabin in time for mud wrestling on Saturday. I'm not kidding. You know when I joke, and now is not one of those times.
Remember when I said "no boyfriend, no problems"? I lied. Tequila. Tequila is a problem.
She was mad I came so fast. I was like, It's the Olympics! Fastest time wins! We can train you in the offseason.
I think god invented us with two hands so we can grab an ass and spank it at the same time.
The bad news is I fucked my exes girlfriend. The good news is I100% understand why he left me
smoked four grams out of a bong with a mixture of pool water and white rum. I applaud you for leaving before losing too many brain cells.
The night is not complete until I am drnk and speaking to inanimate objects
I'm not sure how long my penis is exactly, but I will tell you it resembles a bendy straw
I think that living in the "now" is the worst fucking ghandi buddha whatever advice bc that means I'm just gonna get drunk in the now.
u better not lose ur virginity to a sugar daddy who doesn’t post a pic of himself to tinder
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
Just left the ER. Only good thing... my hot ass nurse Carlos stripped me.
God works in mysterious ways.
I wasnt 2 drunk i sobered up around the time we were shooting the fire extinguishers
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