She asked to borrow my chapstick then said "I promise I won't get herpes on it"
pretty sure mid blowjob I told him I needed to call you and ask you if this was whore-ish. He hid my phone from me.
so. which one of us is going to pay for the neighbors new window? it cracked when i threw the bottle at it but smashed when you threw yours.
part of it is the fact that im problem drinking, and the other part is my OCD wont let me leave the bottle half-empty.
Ok. Cause im very serious about this. I wanna strip and do coke for a month
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
By midnight I was dipping doritos in frosting...that's how my simmer break diet is going.
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
My professor just told me I'm living a lie and I found puke on my pants. How do you think it's going?
Bad idea to be in a car concussed. I just described his dick as an elevator. I think i meant escalator, i dont know
Everyone was hooking up and I was just by myself rolling around in the grass at one point ... Which I am allergic to.
Got drunk with him at an Irish pub ended up losing him for twenty minutes when I finally find him his piss drunk singing Irish folk music with a group of Irish guys and a midget
He meets the coolest people when he's drunk
I'm fine with our borderline lesbian behavior.
We literally laid down in the back of my car and had sex in a parking lot and it was in the top 3 best moral-less decisions I've made.
He was wearing a diaper to the party. I've never felt like such a creep in my life.
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